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The Colostomizer
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#1
12-04-2005
Default Premarital Sex

I am starting this thread for the purpose of debating whether premarital sex is good or bad, and the people I'm looking to argue with are ideally Christians, but can be of any religious faith that discourages premarital sex or of no faith at all. This argument is really between sex with someone you don't love (solely for pleasure) and sex with someone you do love (pleasure, procreation, and the emotional connection), because in our society, marriage is the logical extension of love.

In my humble opinion, premarital sex is in no way wrong or impure, as long as the participating parties are mature enough to go about it in a responsible manner. To me, the pleasure of sex (whether in marriage or not) is one of life's perks. I can see how having sex with someone you truly love would amplify the experience as a whole in the sense that there is a deep emotional connection not present with sex just for pleasure, but that in itself doesn't mean sex for pleasure is bad. Here's an analogy for how I look at it: hot chocolate with marshmellows is rockin' awesome, and hot chocolate without marshmellows isn't quite as good, but it's still pretty sweet. Just because it's better with marshmellows doesn't mean I'm not going to make hot chocolate if I run out of marshmellows.

Waiting until marriage for sex will not amplify the pleasure. If anything, it'll decrease the pleasure for the girl. This is because you're not going to know much about it. Sure, it can be as good for the guy as if he hadn't waited, but that's because it's easy for guys to climax. It might seem really good if it's his first time, but that's not an argument for waiting. He could just do it before marriage and it would seem just as pleasurable then. And on the other hand, waiting will probably decrease the pleasure for the girl. You've got to work for it with the ladies, and if the guy doesn't know what he's doing, it's actually going to suck for the girl. Maybe the girl will think it's good because she's never had good sex to compare it to, but she will realize later in life that it was crappy. They'd have been better off on their honeymoon if they'd learned how to do it sooner. I agree that there will be an emotional connection that couldn't have been experienced before love, but having premarital sex wouldn't ruin that connection for when you do get married. People who have premarital sex and then get married later to someone else aren't missing that connection.

An argument I often hear is that premarital sex is bad because sex was originally designed for procreation. Sex for pleasure isn't about making babies, so it's using it in a way other than what was originally intended. But using something in a way other than what was originally intended is not inherently bad. If you use a hammer as a paper weight, you're not acting immorally.

What problems does anybody have with my arguments so far?

Edit: Casual sex is that which is practiced responsibly, not with a person you love, but with someone you trust (assumed that you're in a position to make that judgment). It's for the sake of pleasure, and in that sense is an empty gesture. But empty doesn't mean wrong. Promiscuous sex is with a person you're not in a position to trust. It's also for the sake of pleasure (or expectations, peer pressure, other shitty reasons), but it's practiced irresponsibly both physically and emotionally and is therefore wrong. Lastly, there's sex between people that love each other (assumed that both parties involved know what love really means, in which case trust is automatically present). Pleasure is certainly involved, but it's also meaningful in a unique sense as a connection between two people who are committed to each other. Sex is not inherently wrong. Like a lot of things, it's only wrong if practiced irresponsibly, and marriage, or even love, is not necessary to have sex in a responsible manner.

Last edited by The Colostomizer; 05-25-2007 at 03:21 AM.
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#2
12-04-2005
Default

Well...the whole idea of saving yourself for marriage comes directly from religion. Sooo...


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#3
12-04-2005
Default

I'm trying to show that saying premarital sex is bad doesn't make sense, even within Christianity. You can't justify that belief outside of religious beliefs, and the only way you can justify it within religion is by saying, "Well, God must have a reason for it, it's just something we can't understand because he's a higher being than us." Most Christians (at least the ones I know) believe that it makes sense that premarital sex is bad, and I'd like to change that.

Last edited by The Colostomizer; 12-13-2005 at 05:44 PM.
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#4
12-04-2005
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The Colostomizer
it makes sense that premarital sense is bad
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#5
12-04-2005
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I Go Both Ways I Would Like Top Save Myself For Marrige But Its A Little Too Late.




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#6
12-04-2005
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fuck, it doesnt really matter...
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#7
12-04-2005
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My grandpa told me at an early age you have to try on the shoe before you buy it.


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#8
12-04-2005
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by The Colostomizer
I am starting this thread for the purpose of debating whether premarital sex is good or bad, and the people I'm looking to argue with are ideally Christians, but can be of any religious faith that discourages premarital sex or of no faith at all. This argument is really between sex with someone you don't love (solely for pleasure) and sex with someone you do love (pleasure, procreation, and the emotional connection), because in our society, marriage is the logical extension of love.

In my humble opinion, premarital sex is in no way wrong or impure, as long as the participating parties are mature enough to go about it in a responsible manner. To me, the pleasure of sex (whether in marriage or not) is one of life's perks. I can see how having sex with someone you truly love would amplify the experience as a whole in the sense that there is a deep emotional connection not present with sex just for pleasure, but that in itself doesn't mean sex for pleasure is bad. Here's an analogy for how I look at it: hot chocolate with marshmellows is rockin' awesome, and hot chocolate without marshmellows isn't quite as good, but it's still pretty sweet. Just because it's better with marshmellows doesn't mean I'm not going to make hot chocolate if I run out of marshmellows.

Waiting until marriage for sex will not amplify the pleasure. If anything, it'll decrease the pleasure for the girl. This is because you're not going to know much about it. Sure, it can be as good for the guy as if he hadn't waited, but that's because it's easy for guys to climax. It might seem really good if it's his first time, but that's not an argument for waiting. He could just do it before marriage and it would seem just as pleasurable then. And on the other hand, waiting will probably decrease the pleasure for the girl. You've got to work for it with the ladies, and if the guy doesn't know what he's doing, it's actually going to suck for the girl. Maybe the girl will think it's good because she's never had good sex to compare it to, but she will realize later in life that it was crappy. They'd have been better off on their honeymoon if they'd learned how to do it sooner. I agree that there will be an emotional connection that couldn't have been experienced before love, but having premarital sex wouldn't ruin that connection for when you do get married. People who have premarital sex and then get married later to someone else aren't missing that connection.

An argument I often hear is that premarital sex is bad because sex was originally designed for procreation. Sex for pleasure isn't about making babies, so it's using it in a way other than what was originally intended. But using something in a way other than what was originally intended is not inherently bad. If you use a hammer as a paper weight, you're not acting immorally.

What problems does anybody have with my arguments so far?
that touched me in my heart lol
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#9
12-04-2005
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what I think is that you put too much thought into this, lol.



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#10
12-04-2005
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I totally agree with the thread starter. Also I feel the religion slows this countries progress with a lot of issues and that needs to stop. I am sorry, but I feel religion blinds people from what is really going on and gives people false motives, and like the view on sex is a prefect example.
 

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